http://news.yahoo.com/s/livescience/20090825/sc_livescience/obesepeoplehaveseverebraindegeneration


that article starts out by yelling about obese people being dumber.

Anyways, we went on a hunt for delicious tasting chicken wings tonight. Puds, Larisssssa, Matty C, kristine B, and me. We found a treatcicle known as The Jug Handle Inn.

http://thejughandleinn.com/

Well, we didn't stumble upon it while sifting for gold, Lar found it on the thinking box known as the Tele-vision. The Food Network can tell you where to eat, not just how to make your eatins!

The wings were amazing. Crispy, salty, hot and sweet. There are so many amazing pieces of this trip. One, light beer 24 oz's for $3. Second, wings. Third, NJ. Fourth, road trip. Five'th, awesomeness.

Irregardlesslie, I've had the best chicken wings ever. Loved every minute of every wing.

Things we don't like today

This all started after three bottles of wine and 7 beers on a Monday night. Lorin and I were both in Maine. We texted it to Jane and Matt to get additions. Please comment to add yours.

Richard Branson
Best buy employees
Local business owners that star/direct their own commercials
Bike messengers
Video/record store employees
Anti gay politicians that are clearly gay
Gay guys that use the wordboi
Oj
Line cutters that act like they are not cutting
Emo hair
People that do not drink. Ever.
Tying my shoes when I'm hungover
Ultimate non-conformists
Monday morning people
Close talkers
Southern people that say "bless her heart"
People that give me dirty looks when I purchase Star mag
People that constantly tell me I should own a home
Geico cavemen ads.
When fox family shows dirty movies
When people are pretentious about wine
Billy mays
Meat heads
Oakley blades when not on the slopes
When people touch my computer screen
Dinner companions that do like food
Prop8
Acronyms I don't understand
MASH
Quiznos
Hot mayo
Joan rivers
Spidey
Rod stewart
Ardmore
Lines for bars with douchebag bouncers
Brand whore
Old city on a sat night
Small portions high prices
Circus peanuts
When you stain brand new clothing
Mandles
Yogurt commercials
Feminine product commercials
Quoting Big Lebowski/godfather
English patient-lost in translation
Ungrateful makeover contestants
Angry reality show people
Millionaire matchmaker men
People that litter
Trustafarians
Radio shak employees
Loud tv commercials
Ultimate sport fans as a casual fan
Vera Bradley
Anne geddes
Stopping short on a crowded sidewalk
Not using turn signals
People who refer to others solely as "my ex"
Passive aggressive facebook updates
Center city wawa employees
Any Bishops collar employee that interfaces with customers
You're your there they're
Push-talk-nextel users
Mouth breathers
Men in their 40's who shop at abercrombie and fitch
Women in their fifties that shop at forever 21
People that work at abercrombie.
Popped collars
Men who refer to their friends as "brah"
Really fake looking knock off bags
The word moist
And real housewife of wherever show

Date Story #59495032

Ok, so I went on a date last night with this guy.
Here are some bullet points.
He was 30 minutes late. I was leaving the bar and he was chasing me down Broad Street apologizing.
I was drunk when he arrived since I waited in a bar drinking wine on an empty stomach.
He had a soul patch (more of a landing strip) that was white, his hair is black.
He prayed at dinner. Twice. Not kidding.
He is in his third round of intense psychotherapy from years of abuse from his father.
He is 45.
He didn’t bring any money.
He is a union organizer and will not tolerate anyone not being a union supporter.
Said that I was ‘all businessy and classy’ and he liked that. He followed up with, ‘I could get used to this classy lifestyle’
Invited me to come to meet his mother. Who he lives with.

Any questions?

Internet Dating

I was going through some e-mails from a internet dating site I was using a while back. Here are some great responses I received. Please note, did not have a single date. Here's why. (none of these were edited in any way. This was on Craigslist under 'strictly platonic' saying I wanted a dinner date-no sex, just dinner).

Hey Ryan, I just got in from work, grabbed something to eat and off to bible study. So tell me a little more about you. Are you in the city, what kind of work do you do ect. Look forwoord to hearing from you pal. Definately would like to talk more, who knows, maybe even a weekend happening ??

Ok heres my photo, I am 6:3 250lbs on the hairy side.
How is your day going?

So may i ask what type of friend you might be looking for?

Hello Rayn, My day is very well so far! How is your day? Thanks for getting back to me. Have to back work may chat later?

Ryan, I am just ot of a relationship. I am looking to hang out with a great guy and go from there.

Hey! You sound so sweet. I love going out to eat! Still live with ex. You must host.

This is me now. Ok, so needless to say, I may put off dating for another year.

It's still January.

Ok, the vegan thing has been working out slightly better after the second week. I am not has hungry anymore. I did lose about 10 lbs so far (actually 10.5). I am getting used to cooking more at home and not eating at restaurants.

Luckily, I have two friends that are doing this with me so share the pain.

I've actually saved a bunch of cash too. I would normally go out to eat every night to socialize. Now, I am having people over so I can cook up some semi-interesting slop.

It's the New Year-2009

While most people feel this is the worst time of the year to make resolutions you may never keep, I feel it's the best. After all, it's my half birthday (yesterday) and Jane B's birthday (today). This year, I am going to keep things as complicated as possible and make the rules benefit me the most.

I am going to make twelve resolutions and carry one out per month all year long. While I'd like to make them up as I go along, I may need a little bit more structure than usual. For example, them month of January (starting January 5th) I am going vegan. Not forever, but for the good part of 25 days I will eat no meats, fish, poultry, eggs, or dairy.

Here are some other ideas I have for the rest of 2009

February: Have sex with someone else in the room month.
March: Eat only things that are the color red-month
April: Exercise at on days that begin with the letter 'T'-month
May: Save $5 a week in an interest bearing savings account-month
June (my birthday month): Make out with two (or more) strangers a week-month
July: Only eat out at restaurants once a week-month
August: Buy a pair of cowboy boots-month

I am out of ideas for Sept, Oct, Nov, and Dec. Any help is greatly appreciated.

Text Conversation with 15 friends

This is how the texting went today:

I began:
RP: Quote from my date last night: I can't line danec too much, I just got liposuction.

Here were the responses:
Courtney: OMG
Jane: OMG Best ever!
Krista: Good God! how did that go????
Billy: I can't kiss you tonight, I just threw up in my mouth.
Dante: Oh no....there's at least four things wrong with that sentence!
MattB: Are you kidding me??? Why aren't you keeping him? Quality people like that don't come along often! You snob.
Julia: OMG funniest quote ever.
Adam: Oh my. Ummm.....how does one even respond to this?
Zach: He wanted to take you line dancing? He had lipo?
JohnH: Mwaahaahaa....that's a keeper. Where'd u find him, and is he cute?
Vince: That's hilarious :-)
Massie: Wait? what?
Adam: We are all saddened.
Dante: And how did you come to meet this wunderkind?
JohnH: Shame, but she does sound a little messy;) did u at least get fucked in the deal? or was that 2 much for the stitches as well?
Larissa: Tastes like knives!
Steven: why did your date involve line dancing?
Massie: Are you powerdating? Why did line dancing ever come up in the first place?
Meaghan: OMG hahahahahahahh!
Daniel: Really, you did not like a four hour conversation about two stepping?
DanE: No tush push for you!
Annette: Was lipo worth it? Did he look good? Line dancing?
Stephen: You are not my brother. Adopted.
Vinny: today is Madonna's birthday. Line dancing?

Creepy

I just saw the new Batman movie. Heath Ledger was awesome and very creepy.

Anyhoo, I spent the weekend with my parents. This is one way for me to never date again. Seriously. I really need to figure out how I am spending my time. I got there Friday. We ordered a pizza, watched a movie, fell asleep.

Saturday, we went to their pool (in their 55+ housing community). Then, because it was 100 degrees, went to Costco. Went to dinner, watched a movie, went to sleep. I love spending time with them, but if this is supposed to be my year of dating, I am really not stepping it up.

I trashed the on-line dating thing. I semi-tried that on craigslist, which was NOT working for me. I don't think the Match.com thing is for me either. I think I am going to go with plan B.

I am going to become a slut. Yep. I am going to start going home with people from bars. I mean, it's the same as meeting someone on-line, without having to buy dinner. I am going to try on Monday. That's not a super competitive day to do it, but I am going to give it a whirl.

Stay tuned for Tuesday's post. Between now and then I should purchase a condom. Or more than one.

Sex in the City Movie

I saw the Sex in the City movie (twice for good measure). I thought it was a good flick.

Anyway, I tried the semi-serious dating situation. I let a boy leave a toothbrush at my house. Three weeks later, it was exactly what it usually brews into. A nice steaming cup of break up. I am not sure it was the toothbrush that did us in.

While the toothbrush did take up a serious amount of room in my bathroom cabinet, next to the seven toothbrushes of my friends and some former boyfriends, I think it took on a life of it's own. The toothbrush forced me into the usual rut. I like to be alone. Not all the time, but some of the time.

The toothbrush wasn't alone. But my need for 25% of my free time being alone did us in. I need to work this out. I think the book The Secret, or Eat Pray Love, or some other Oprah inspired book will help me get learnded.

best web site ever-thanks Jane!

http://www.iloveponies.com/pages/home.php

Dating Spring 2008

Due to my interweb savviness, sparkling personality, and sharp dressing abilities, I've started dating again this year. You'll be happy to know that I am being more selective and keeping an open mind to the suggestions/veto power of my friends and loved ones.

I went on some dates recently with this boy. We had some dates, some meals, some sleep overs, etc...All is good. However, I am experimenting with a new thing I've never done before. I've started dating someone who is young than me by 6 years. Honestly, I don't think I've ever dating anyone in their 20's! Not even when i was a tween. Crazy. The usual manlove I like to get involved with involves a man 20 years my senior. I guess as I get older, the young boys keep staying the same age. I should ride that gravy train immediately.

I will keep you posted how this turns out. Dating experiments are fun.

footnote: I've been travelling a bit, so these have been written previously and I'm just getting around to typing these in.

Lovely Souraya

www.sourayahamdi.com

Ok. I thought I was having a 'pretty day' until my love Souraya sent me a xmas card. She does makeup and stuff in NYC and has a lovely website.

That bitch doesn't fucking age a bit. She actually gets hotter. whore.

I need your name now

This is a very important post. I am collecting names from one of those name generators. Yes, I have free time and this may become a new art installation project in the future. Or, this will be a funny post on this blog.

Please go to this site and get your drag name.

http://www.blogthings.com/dragqueennamegenerator/

Jimmy is: Zsa Zsa LaHore
Matt is: Lois Carmen Denominator
Larissa is: Pussy Golitely
Jane is: Ivana Dick
Ryanp is: Krystie Kreme
Lil'Ryan is: Felicia Fellatio
Daniel is: Sofanda Cox
Dave is: Ursalu Uranu

Are you pregnant?!?!

Have you ever heard the horror story of someone asking a woman if they are preggy when they are not? Shudder.

This woman at work asked me if I lost some weight and how I did it. I told her I cut out junk food and try to go running once a week. She said she was afraid to ask me since I could be sick. Since I am gay and all. Yeah, she was implying that I had Aids.

I then asked her how long she was battling breast cancer. She gave me a puzzled look. Then I explained that not all gay men have HIV and not all women are battling breast cancer. I think our relationship is now strained.

chocolate junior

Dating is my favorite sport.

I went on a date tonight. The man is adorable in a semi-sad way. A lovely person, cute, and polite. He has spiked hair (self proclaimed like Billy Idol). He wore a faded denim shirt, severely un-ironed. A corporate logo-ed wind breaker and awkward jeans. He says he's 49 years old (questionable). He has a moustache and a soul-patch. Here is some dialogue. KEY: rp=me G=guy or gay or goodstory

rp: So, what is your favorite type of food?
G: Chocolate Juniors.

rp: What the hell is Chocolate Juniors?
G: Those little Tastycakes you get at the WaWa.
rp: Oh. I meant type of food.
G: Nothing too rich in taste.

G: How did you get into HR? Did you take an internalship?
rp: Do you mean Internship?
G: Yeah, I think so.

Waiter: What can I get for you guys?
rp: I'll have the Carnitas (yeah, we were in a Mexican place)
G: I'll have the fajitas. But I don't want any gookamooly.
rp: I think it's pronounced guacamole.

rp: So, how did you find out you liked Chocolate Juniors?
G: My Mom bought me a box of them the other day. She gave them to me before I went to work.
rp: So, you live with your Mom?
G: Yeah. I moved in with her when my boyfriend and I broke up.
rp: Sorry to hear about your breakup. When did you guys break up?
G: Two years ago.
rp: Oh, when you were 47 years old?
G: Ummmm. yeah. Then.

rp: I like your spikey hair.
G: I like to be behind the trends. I used to have a mullet, but I cut it off 5 years ago.
rp: Maybe that was the style?
G: No. That style was not in at all. The guys at the plant talked me into cutting it off. I finally gave in.
rp: I am glad you don't have a mullet anymore.
G: Me too. I liked it at the time. I have a cocker spaniel named Misty. It reminded me of her.
rp: I am getting tired (omg Greys Anatomy is on). Can you drive me home?